Help! Problems Installing Husband 1.0!
Dear Tech Support,
Help!!!
Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a distinct slow down in overall system performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry applications, which operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.
In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as: Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, and then installed undesirable programs such as:
- NBA 5.0
- NFL 3.0
- Golf Clubs 4.1
Also, Conversation 8.0 no longer runs and Housecleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system. Please note that I have tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems, but to no avail.
What can I do?
Signed,
Desperate.
Dear Desperate,
First, keep in mind, Boyfriend 5.0 is an Entertainment Package, while Husband 1.0 is an Operating System.
Please enter command: ithoughtyoulovedme.html and try to download Tears 6.2 and do not forget to install the Guilt 3.0 update.
If that application works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, remember, overuse of the above application can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1.
(Please note that Beer 6. 1 is a very bad program that will download the Farting and Snoring Loudly Beta.)
Whatever you do, DO NOT under any circumstances install Mother-In-Law 1.0 (it runs a virus in the background that will eventually seize control of all your system resources.)
In addition, please do not attempt to reinstall the Boyfriend 5.0 and associated programs as they are unsupported and will crash Husband 1.0.
In summary, Husband 1.0 is a operation system, but it does have limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider buying additional software to improve memory and performance. We recommend Cooking 3.0 and Hot Lingerie 7.7.
Good Luck!
Tech Support
@human3rror: Help! Problems Installing Husband 1.0! – 
this metaphor makes more sense to me than real life.
peace | dewde
It would.
My recent post I don’t like Christian music
you win too!
hehe… All I ever get is "System Error"
seriously.
John, just wanted to let you know there is an EasterEgg hidden inside of Tears 6.2. Apparently the coder installed a work around to avoid having to launch Guilt 3.0, Jewelry 2.0, and Flowers 3.5. If the husband opens the Sink 4.0 folder and deletes all of the junk files that always seem to pile up, then Guilt 3.0 will be unnecessary and Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5 can be saved for future uses of ithoughtyoulovedme.html. (Thus avoiding the above mentioned default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 or Beer 6.1)
Or at least that's the way it works in my house.
My recent post Caption Please.
Wow. I mean. Wow. That is well beyond the typical scripting there.
most epic comment award!
whoa! husband-hack!
ha. this is hilarious. Another great program to avoid Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5 is RandomBubbleBath 1.2. It's pretty new and a quick fix to many Husband 1.0 System Issues.
sexy.
Hmm…I'm currently running the beta version of Single, and have only heard whispers of Mother-in-Law 1.0. I fear the day my OS gets exposed to such a terrible virus.
My recent post Primal Released today
PC Load Letter!?
My recent post Why I Love Him
Sometimes "PC Load Letter" makes more sense to me than the output I'm getting from my spouse software. And she would confirm the same is true for her.
peace | dewde
you win!
Just tell her to upgrade to NFL4.0 and all will be well MUWAHAHAHAHA
My recent post Zany, I Tell You
John you forgot to mention that Husband 1.0 is only for PC. Mac users experience no trouble.
My recent post Caption Please.
pwned!
Husband 1.0 is actually made to run with the support file Jesus 7.0 (the full install not the trial issue)
there is a significant improvement in many areas.
This often automatically schedules the sink 4.0, trash 5.5, and laundry 3.2 when necessary to maintain system stability.
however it will be necessary to regularly run hot lingerie 7.7, action movie 3.5 , play station 3.0,
once a day be sure to run Honey I'm home 3.3 this will shut down all systems for 1 hour and reloads Husband 1.0 in family mode…
My recent post When You Can’t Go On… Pile Stones
AWESOME!!!
^^^^^
haha! scary.
perfect…!!!
In a unstable OS do not under any circumstances run Child 1.0, Child 2.0, and Child 3.0 in an attempt to restore stability (remember, all are individual, intense resource consuming processes….), because operating system stability can be further compromised to the point where there is often no available resources or memory for Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. However, Babysitter 16.0 and Nice Dinner 5.1 have a way of building a suitable development platform to reintroduce Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5 as compatible processes…
I have nothing clever to say….. you are all hilarious….
by the way this post is gold!
My recent post The Token
NO TROUBLE AT ALL.
PEACE | DEWDE
wha.
Have you never seen the movie "Office Space"!?
My recent post Why I Love Him
I'm currently running Boyfriend 1.0 with LongDistanceRelationship 2.5 running as smoothly as possible.
And yes… John… this post is fantastic!
My recent post Our Saviour’s “Goes Google”
I am still on level 0, living at home with his parents.
I do not even know what level 5.0 looks like, at least not for a long time.
Yeah that's where I'm at too – I'm pretty sure the software's name is Bachelor 3.3 with update Hopeful – 3.3.1 installed.
insta-fail.
John
Haha!
John
AirlineMilesAccumulation 7.0 is getting a workout! haha
Epic!
John
Brilliant!!! I'd hope that I keep up with some of the flowers 2.0 and maybe some romance 4.0 good thing my wife can't be here to comment! I'd hate to see how I'm really doing
seriously LOL.
Haha! Good to see you tonight!
John
John… no words.
My recent post apollo 11 revisited :: grandpa rudy’s one small step
those are 3 words plus a smiley face.
lol too true…
I'm a MAC husband OS… Wife 1.0 is experiencing no system failures….
it's Mac, not MAC
whatever.
teehee.
—
John Saddington
JohnSaddington.com
I bought into all the hype of the Software manufacturer and dumped husband 1.0 thinking there was a better OS. Now I am left with no service provider at all. Think before you believe an upgrade is in order. Some bits of information byte. (This whole situation could have definately been avoided had we tried Jesus 7.0)
doh!
You know, I wonder if Husband 1.0 is really the problem? I wonder if there is some coding issue in Wife 1.0 that conflicts with Husband 1.0 that Husband 1.0 can’t quite compute. Maybe there’s some compiling that has to be done on both Wife 1.0 and Husband 1.0 before the two really work together. Something to consider.
aha!